The cattle were lowing The poor baby wakes. The woman RUNS SCREAMING INTO THE BARN AISLE SHAKING HER ARMS.
My barn was most definitely not the peaceful scene portrayed in "Away in the Manger" tonight. After a long, rather scary ride home (we were pulling a trailer and encountered black ice on every bridge between here and Mitchell), I went out to do chores as fast I as I could so I can get in to watch Sherlock. I glanced in the feed bin, which was mostly empty, and turned on the auger to fill it up. I then realized I had forgotten the scoop in it so I reached inside.
AND A F*CKING RAT RAN UP MY ARM.
I am sorry, this kind of horrifying situation absolutely demands an f-bomb. So many f-bombs. Because a f*cking rat ran up my arm and jumped off my shoulder onto the barn floor.
I didn't even react until the point it jumped from my shoulder and at that point, I started screaming bloody murder and flailing my arms. I now completely understand what it means to become "hysterical". To make matters worse, there were 2 MORE rats still in the feed bin. With few other options, I just filled the bin until there was enough grain for them to reach the top and jump out. They weren't even that scared, just sort of sauntered over to a hole under the hog floor.
And the barn cats?
Oh the useless, fat, lazy things we call "barn cats" just sat on a ledge of the wall and watched the whole thing with an expression of "Oh yeah, thanks for getting them out. Their scratching was disturbing my beauty sleep." WORTHLESS CREATURES.
I have known this rat problem was growing as the winter went on--cat food was going too fast and periodically bags were being chewed open. But I didn't know it would reach such epic proportions. I mean, we have 5 cats!!!! And 4 dogs running around in there. But apparently not one of them is of any use against rats. And since I won't use poison and rats that aren't terribly hungry (which ours aren't with a hog bulk feeder in place) are hard to trap, we have a bit of a pickle of a problem. So anyone have a rasty little terrier I can borrow for a week or two?