This idiot is going to drive me perfectly bonkers.

He has once more abandoned all the safe, comfortable and sane places to sleep at night and insists on making his way (alone, no other bird is dumb enough to join him) to the very top level of Evie’s play deck. Let us all remember that this deck has been named the “murder deck” due to its situation as a virtual buffet for the local owl family.

Beyond the danger to Lloyd’s life and limb, this would merely be an annoyance made of unwanted turkey poo if it weren’t for the fact that after getting up to that top level, he absolutely cannot figure out how to get back down again. 🤦‍♀️

After fetching him down for several days in a row (which involves some precarious turkey leg grabbing while on a ladder and then tucking his giant Lloydness under my arm so he doesn’t flap and cause us both to fall), I decided to just leave him up there for a day to see if the lack of food, water and anyone to show off for would drive him to figure out how to get down on his own.

No chance.

That idiot just stayed up there, strutting like a fool on the deck, acting like that was exactly what he had planned all along. 😑 It was hot and windy and he had no food or water but none of that had any effect on his vaudeville show-the strutting, thumping and general Lloydness never stopped. Afraid he would dehydrate into turkey jerky, I fetched him down mid-afternoon, once more wondering what I’d done to deserve such a penance in the form of this white, feathered buffoon.

And so as of today, we dug Evie’s old baby gate out of the shed to keep the farm’s biggest, dumbest baby from turning into snack food.

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